easter

i almost didn't do anything for easter this year. the easter bunny visits our house friday night, because we want to keep easter sunday about the savior.
in the last 3 moves, all of the easter baskets have disappeared. not permanently, but it's going to require going through all of the boxes and organizing them to find them all. that was part of my lack of desire to do anything. i already had all treats and things, but i didn't know if it was going to be worth it.

on thursday, i "boiled" eggs.
saturday morning, the ward had an easter egg hunt. since we couldn't find the easter baskets, and i wanted the kids to have something more than grocery bags, i ran to the dollar store to find some buckets. the hunt would have been more fun if 3 kids hadn't found the majority of the eggs. taylor, my angel, shared some of his with his little sisters. otherwise, they wouldn't have gotten any.
saturday afternoon, we decorated the eggs using these.

it was fun and fairly painless. these are the little girls' hands, and this was the worst of the damage! i had gotten 3 packages, and we only used one. i'm putting the others up for next year.

 shannon

 ashley

 all of our beautiful eggs.

 ashleys'. she had a little help with the blue and pink striped one.

 elizabeths'.

 taylors'. very minimalistic

 shannons'.

mama's. there was one extra eggs, and i decided to it.

sunday morning, elizaeth came into my bedroom first thing, and complained that the easter bunny didn't come. 

we got everyone ready for church and raced out the door. after sacrament, shaun decided that he and ashley should go back home. he wasn't feeling great and she still had a cough. when i brought them home, i put michael in bed, and put the baskets together. then i went back to church .

snowman!

the snow we got earlier in the season wasn't really snowman snow. that, and it got really cold. we had an early spring storm that dropped about 6 inches of new wet snow. shannon convinced her dad to help her build a snowman.

i didn't realize at the time that she was wearing 2 different boots! in this picture, his face is carved in. later the kids found part of the snowman kit and put the nose and hat on him. shannon named him frosty. frosty stayed with us for about 4 days before he got chopped apart.

blue and gold

we didn't go to the scout blue and gold banquet last year, probably because i'd just had michael. and possibly because half of the ward we were in made me feel uncomfortable. but, we did this year.

 the theme was "knights of the round table". this ward has been amazing. once they found out shaun was an artist, they ask him to do all sorts of things for events. he drew this as a backdrop for pictures. (the only thing missing is the dragon!)

they had these little scooters, and pool noodles, and they had jousting! it was fun to watch!

silly sleeping!

 not sure what happened here, but all of a sudden, she got really quiet and this is how and where i found her. in the middle of the walkway between the front room and dining room.

 she was watching a movie, and apparently really crashed!

this is shannon. for christmas 2 years ago, she got a rapunzel tower that breaks down into a table and chairs. one night, she put the tower top on her head and fell asleep. i think she did it to shut out the light and maybe the noise.

court

as it was a long week, i didn't think to take pictures when the curls were still fresh. she was absolutely adorable, and we were told by many people that she did wonderful. i have an awesomely brave girl!
not only that, but she won! she told her story, and he was put away, for how long, we don't know yet.

brownies

this is what happens when you leave the brownies out where everyone can get to them. they decide to try and help themselves. (i think this was taylor, but i'm not sure)

waiting room waiting

while sitting at elizabeths counselling one day, the little girls decided they wanted their hair done. i put 2 braids in their hair, and then tried to get a picture of the boy.

speaking of hair.....

these pictures don't quite do it justice. ashley has a few locks of hair in back that ringlet just after baths, and only if not brushed out. but, her hair always looks beautiful, even when it hasn't been washed all week.

party

elizabeth was invited to a birthday party for a friend sometime in february. they went to one of the beauty colleges, and had "makeovers". she had an absolute blast! they did their hair, makeup, and nails. i didn't know about her nails so i didn't get a picture.

 beautiful makeup. (why is it that she can't take a picture without tilting her head? and poking her tongue through her teeth...?)

gorgeous hair!

at 7, she's a heart throb. i'm terrified for 16!

birthdays

we celebrated taylor's and shannon's birthdays together. we did that because we didn't have any money at shannon's birthday.

 this is taylors cake. he wanted a cars race track. those are his cars.

shannon wanted a rainbow cake. i didn't have any food coloring alternatives, so hers is made with normal coloring.

 we invited some friends and nana over. apparently, we didn't snap a picture of nana, but she's around the corner from the high chair in the bottom right corner.

taylor got his new scout book, a couple of new books, a toy we kept out from christmas, and a couple pairs of pants.
shannon got some new movies.

we kept it pretty low-key.

updates

so, i have a bunch of posts i want to do, but i dont' want to put them up without the pictures to go with them. my computer died about 6 weeks ago, and my means of transferring photos from camera to computer along with them.

need to figure out how to get them from the camera to shauns computer soon though. the card is starting to get full!

anxiety

my anxiety made a surprise visit on sunday. it's never any fun, but this one was worse.

i was walking down the the hall to get to sunday school at church, and i just couldn't do it. i stopped about halfway there, and just stood in the hall. shaun came back from taking the kids to their classes, and he got me to try going to class. i'm sitting there in class, and i can feel the panic welling up inside. i was able to tamp it down and thought i'd gotten a hold of it. it reared it's ugly head a little later in the form of nausea. i just about tossed michael at shaun and got out.
i went to the bathroom, but there were people in there. i went to the other bathroom, but there were people in there as well. i ambled my back in the direction of class, but couldn't get myself to go back in.
shaun came out a few minutes later, and took me and michael home.

i wish i knew what caused it, and i wish i knew how to avoid it happening again.

normal chaos

the normal chaos has taken over my life for the moment. that and i've been struggling with being in the dumps a little bit.

relief

elizabeth has been seeing a counselor twice a week for the last 3 months to prepare her for trial. now that the trial is over, we are only going once a week. today the counselor told her that her abuser is in jail and that he can't hurt her any more. elizabeth's relief was obvious and physical. she relaxed and was no longer as stressed. now we can start moving on.

surgery

michael is on his third ear infection in about as many weeks. he gets antibiotics for it, and about 2 days after he finishes them, he's running a fever and complaining about his ears again. 3 is my limit, so i immediately asked for a referral to the ent. he had his ent appointment today and after talking with the doctor, he's scheduled for tubes on thursday. the doctor said there is still fluid in the inner ears. they aren't infected at this point, but he is on an antibiotic right now. his tonsils look fine so we are only doing the tubes. i'm anticipating him being the first patient. but you never know!

stress

we have discovered that stress gives me migraines, and resets my menstrual cycle.

stress causes shauns bowels to go haywire.

needless to say, it's been an eventful few weeks!

finish line

this last week marked the finish of an extremely long roller coaster ride. and we are so grateful to be done. it was a stressful week, and very trying, but the relief of finally being done is so sweet.

wednesday, trial started. jury selection took until 2, and then i was the first witness after lunch. even though we knew he would try to turn this around and make it about our parenting, it still made us mad.
thursday, elizabeth was scheduled to testify. we took her in early, and some friends helped to curl her hair and make her beautiful (i forgot to take pictures until later in the day, after the curls had fallen!). her original counselor testified ahead of her. shaun and i were asked and elected to stay out of the courtroom during her testimony. we had discovered that she was hesitant to disclose information when we were present. but we have been told by everyone present, even some we didn't know, that she was fabulous. shaun was the first witness after lunch, and then the investigating detective.
friday, the detective finished up, shaun had a one question recall that he was told not to answer, and then the defense brought in their character witnesses. we chose not to stay for anything that we were not needed for. after lunch, the guy took the stand for himself. they finished with proceedings around 5, and then the jury went into deliberation. they finished up around 9. verdict wasn't read until after 10, because no one could find the guy. he was charged with 1 count of sexual abuse of a minor, and 1 charge of lewd conduct with a minor. the jury acquitted him of the lewd conduct charge, but found him guilty of the sexual abuse charge. he was taken into custody that night, and led away. apparently, he wasn't expecting a guilty verdict and certainly not being arrested right then. his sentencing is set for april 5.

i thought that his attorney brought up a lot of information that wasn't really helpful for his side. even if my children were unruly and always walking into peoples houses uninvited, that doesn't give him the right to molest my daughter (those are claims he made). he clarified twice that i had a nursing baby that summer...the jury had 9 women, most of them mothers. his character witnesses apparently constantly contradicted themselves. ie. the playground area had been constructed for everyone, but my children were not invited over (?!).
there was a lot of media coverage for this trial. both local newspapers ran multiple articles, and one of the news channels ran a few segments as well. the video cameras were not in the courtroom when we were there, and for that i'm grateful. one of the people helping us through all this mess told me that they rarely see a sexual abuse case go to trial. the accused usually plea out. elizabeths' original counselor told us that in the 20+ years she's been doing this, this is the only time she's ever had to go to court.
i mentioned to shaun the other night that i hoped that he'd put all his affairs in order. shaun was pretty certain that he hadn't. the guy was completely convinced that he didn't do anything wrong, and that elizabeth had instigated it all.

we are just glad that everything is finally finished. hopefully, now we can move on and put this all behind us!

overload

the last 36 hours have been brutal!

yesterday we learned that a local newspaper ran an article about the court case. there's now a concern that there might be difficulty finding an unbiased jury. our names were never used, thank goodness. however, details were given that should not have been. i learned things that i didn't know. at first we were mad. now, we are just resigned, i think.

michael has been running a high fever for the last few days. around 103. when he had his shots last week, the nurse told me that he might run a high fever and/or get a rash from the mmr. in my mind, 103 is not a side effect, it's something else. i finally called the doctor first thing this morning to get some answers. we had a wic appointment at 10:30, and i still hadn't heard anything back from the doctors' office. as i was getting kids in the car to go to wic, shaun yells out the door that the doctors office just called and i missed it. as i was running late, i had to let it go.
i got back from wic, and had just missed another call from the doctors office. i checked the message from the first call, and wasn't going to worry about it. the nurse said that about 20% of kids run a fever, and 103 or higher is normal. shaun was able to talk to the nurse the second time she called, and she said because he had a cough as well, that we should take him in. so, i called back in and made an appointment for later in the afternoon.

elizabeth had a birthday party of a friend that she was going to. the party ended 30 minutes after michaels appointment started. i let her know ahead of time that i might be late in picking her up. i got the the doctors office, and we sat in the waiting room for at least half a hour. they had the movie finding nemo in, we got there just as marlin meets dory, and didn't get called back to the room until he'd met crush the turtle. then we sat in the room for another 10-20 minutes. in all, i was there for an hour. turns out michaels ear infection from last week didn't go away with the z-pack. so, the doctor called in a new antibiotic. we even made sure the pharmacy was going to be open long enough for me to go pick it up.
when we were done with the doctor, i ran to go pick up elizabeth. she'd been done for half hour, and i was worried about her. when i got there, i learned that someone had given her a ride home. one less thing to worry about!! i then scurried over to the pharmacy to get the prescription for michael. they didn't have it yet, so i sat back to wait. 20 minutes later, we were still waiting. another 20 minutes and they started trying to track down the doctor to get it. another 10 minutes and they finally had it and were filling it. i KNEW i should have asked for a hard copy of the script. i've gone to the pharmacy 4-5 hours after appointments and the scripts had been sent over, and they had just barely gotten them.

i'm so very glad this day is over, and i have the night to recover!

check-up

michael had his 1 year check-up on friday.

the kid weighs a whole 17 pounds. but, he's 2.5 feet tall!

during his check-up, we discovered that he had an ear infection. we got an antibiotic for him, and he's been doing a lot better. he started sleeping through the night again!

yesterday, he climbed up onto the couch. he's growing up SO fast!!

miserable night

i have 2 children that slept well last night. the rest of us had a bad night.

taylor came upstairs around 1:30, saying he was scared. i helped him make up a bed on the front room floor, and he slept the rest of the night away.
shannon came into my room around 2:30 or so. i put her on the floor next to my bed. for the next hour she tossed, coughed, and turned. at one point she wanted to hold my hand, or have in on her. that went on for about 45 minutes, and i had both arms fall asleep multiple times. when she settled down, i pulled my arms back up.
ashley started crying at one point last night. i don't remember exactly when. i put her blanket back on her, hugged her for a few minutes, and she settled down.
shaun's rls acted up last night. he jumped, and tossed and turned all night long as well.
i had bizarre dreams the first part of the night, and then just couldn't sleep the rest of the night.

the dream i remember started out that the windows had been left open and someone had come into the house. i couldn't find anything missing, but i closed and locked all the windows.
then it turned into a fight of sorts. there were guns. i think i had one, and it wouldn't fire, no bullets. an unknown guy had the second gun. after 3 failed attempts to shoot me, he turned it to his chest and fired. this time it worked. then, he disappeared. taylor showed up with a bullet in his chest. how it got there, i don't know. the guy that shot himself should have died. the shot was at pointblank range, and directly into his heart. taylors bullet was in the same place, but superficial. i was going to remove it and clean him up. then someone woke me up.

review

it's been another one of those long weeks. the only day i didn't go anywhere was monday. and that's because it had snowed 12-18 inches in 24 hours. not many people went anywhere.

2 trips to idaho falls again. two speech therapy visits. an emergency dental visit. a routine doctor visit.

unfortunately for me, this is how my life is for the next foreseeable future.

today, i also went grocery shopping. after getting home, i took care of the groceries. i shredded 8 pounds of cheese and froze them. i cooked 9 pounds of chicken and diced and froze it. i made a cabbage salad. i cut up a head of lettuce for salad. i put away 12 day-old muffins for later days.

my feet hurt, my back hurts, and i'm exhausted!

goals

i have a few goals for this new year. and i'm hoping that by writing them down and telling "Everyone" that i might actually be able to accomplish a few of them.

i want to read the doctrine and covenants all the way through. i'd like to read the book of mormon as well, but think that might be pushing it a little.
i want to be better at writing in my journal. life goes so fast, and without some record, my ancestors won't know what my life was like. blogging is part of this.
i want to have a cleaner house. shaun and i talk about this all the time. he complains that the house is never clean. that's not true, it's just not show house clean. i have 5 kids, my house is lived in. on the other hand, my house is NOT filthy. there are not piles of garbage sitting around, there aren't dirty clothes filling rooms.

these are the main ones. here's hoping i can accomplish at least parts of these.

christmas calendar

the grandparent christmas calendar is FINISHED! and a whole 2 months earlier than last year!

car woes

about 3 weeks ago, the van starting acting up. on my way to an appointment, it starts lurching, and then didn't want to shift. turns out the transmission fluid was gone. at the moment, it's parked in the driveway until we can get it looked at. we're hoping the transmission wasn't permanently damaged.
thankfully, we had a car parked at the house in sugar. it needed a new battery, and the license renewed. the only downside is we can't all legally fit.
a week ago, the car started acting up. it was acting like it was running out of gas, but the gauge read 3/8 of a tank. we changed the spark plugs, and hoses, and thought that was it. yesterday, something started knocking around in back when i was stopping, and the heat died. last night, it wouldn't start.
as of right now, the consensus is that it's the fuel filter. but until they actually look, they won't know for sure.
(1p)

UPDATE: (7:00p) it's not the fuel filter.

UPDATE 2: (8:30p) they put it on the computer, and diagnosis is coils.

slacker

it's been awhile since i've really blogged anything. lately, i find myself lacking energy and desire to do much. i get basics done, but can't seem to do much more than that. the laundry hasn't been put away for 3 weeks, we've been pulling clothes out of the baskets. i'm hoping to get a few more things done a week, and eventually get to the point that everything is maintenance instead of disaster management. and then organized.

i was telling shaun today that my house will never be a show house clean. that is not my goal. my house is lived in, and by 5 little people to boot. if i can stay on top of the basics, i'm doing pretty good!

waiting for christmas

we had gotten the tree up, and decorated. the kids were ready for bed, and we were trying to get everyone back together to have prayer.
shannon comes upstairs, plops on the couch, sighs, and says, "we are still waiting for christmas."

what a character!!!

moving

i have discovered that when it's time to move, i fall apart.
there's so much that needs to be done, that i can't think, and have no idea where to start.

i hate moving