notable quotable

"always say yes to new adventures"

-author unknown

missing

ashley, age 6, just lost another tooth. Her 4 front teeth are gone! She is so funny looking!

gratitude

today, i'm grateful for flexibility

kidnapped....?!

michael, age 4, after helping look for his older siblings, (nonchalantly) "i think they got kidnapped."

preparation

why is it that it takes so much work to get ready to go on a trip?!

today, i did a massive amount of laundry. have to make sure that 7 people have 7 days worth of clothes...

i also tried to deep clean the little girls room. mainly, so we could have all the laundry clean. but it gets a little absurd how quickly it gets trashed.

i also did a marathon sewing party this weekend to finish the alterations on my dress for this wedding. going to try to get a good pic.

christmas

i like this smaller christmas thing. less to have to deal with when it's all done, and less to have to get rid of as well.

vacation

the kids are on christmas break from wednesday thru the new year.
school breaks bring about their own struggles.

but, they are having fun so far, and next week we'll be in utah for a wedding. good thing i don't have to figure out how to pull them out for a whole week...

12 days

we have a tradition of doing the 12 days of christmas. it started with  my parents, and we do a nativity set.
last year, we did a family with kids, and the nativity was a set of blocks.
this year, we did a sister in the ward that needed a little bit of cheering up. and we gave a nativity ornament set.

tonight, we got caught. taylor didn't run fast enough. the dog got out, and chased him down.

notable quotable

it's not hoarding if it's books

don't drive drunk

Crazy insane afternoon!! 

On the way home from shopping, ended up calling 911 for the idiot in front of me. Swerving all over the road, hitting guard rails, nearly running multiple people, including me, off the road, getting to within inches of people before passing, hitting upwards of 80 miles an hour on dangerous snowy roads. 20+ miles later, when officers were able to get to him, he ended up off the road. 

Thankfully, everyone was watched over, and no one was hurt.

aux finit

i am all done with christmas.
everything is purchased and has arrived.

and more importantly, everything is wrapped!!

i can now spend the next few days enjoying the season and making some goodies

BLIZZARD

visibility is less than a block....

heat wave

he he! i love making titles that make you think!

having problems with my van overheating...... a lot.....
like even when the temps are super sub-zero

i keep putting antifreeze in, but it keeps loosing it somehow.
the radiator is brand new as of august, so i'm really hoping it's not that.
and we checked all the hoses before i came back, so it shouldn't be that either.

had a guy from the ward come look at it. he can see that it's leaking, but can't seem to find the source.

christmas village

this is how my village looked this year. next year, i hope to have more of the buildings done.

BRRR!

dang it's been cold!

sub zero temps, and then thursday night the power goes out! while i'm working on christmas...
the weather needs to take a chill pill...

uh, yeah

fun mom

Tonite, i'm fun mom. It's 8:30, bedtime, and i just put in the new petes dragon!

shocking!

today, i went to get my daiths pierced. hoping that it would help with the migraines.

i went to a local tattoo parlor, inks anonymous. they were fabulous, and didn't want quite as much to do them.

i had one that was difficult to thread the jewelry through, so that one is a little sore.
the other one was like putting a hot knife through butter. slick as a whistle!

the only problem we ran into was that i went into shock.
the piercer made sure that i was recovered before he let me leave the shop.

notable quotable

"i hope our daughters are born with so much fire in their souls, they could put volcanoes and stars to shame."

-Nikita Gill

when it rains, it pours

shaun came home from work early today.
he'd been laid off. with no hope of rehire. the owner of the company had been consistently lying. telling everyone that he had a contract that he hadn't completed yet.

this was not welcome news. christmas is a month away, and we still have to pay bills.

he went out this afternoon to look for another job. he came home with 2!
he walked into a local card place, artco, and walked out with a seasonal job.
he called on a tentative commission he got in july, and got off the phone with another job!

migraines

i'm so done with migraines!!

i'm going to go get my daiths pierced today.
with the exception of the artificial sweeteners, i've not been able to identify any triggers.

update: the place i tried to get the piercings done at was not open today. i called and made an appointment at another place, 15 miles closer to home! friday!

forgotten carols?!

growing up, my family had the tradition of inviting friends over, and we would listen to dad read the forgotten carols.
in utah and idaho, they come and put on a play. tickets have been difficult for us to obtain.

this year, shaun surprised me with tickets.

true, they were clear up in the nosebleed section. true, we were late. true, i had absolutely no warning.

but, it was nice to see it in person anyways!

thanksgiving

wednesday, i made pumpkin roll.

i also complained to a friend that i didn't feel like cooking for thanksgiving. i would do it, but i didn't really want to. she then told me to just come to her place, and than i wouldn't have to deal with anything.

what a blessing. that she was so willing to add us to her family for the holiday. i didn't have to cook anything, and we even got sent home with leftovers.

preschool

i applied for headstart for michael, and tried to see what it would take to get him into the preschool in the school district.

today, i got a call that he's been accepted and there's an open spot for him at headstart.
i also got a call that he doesn't qualify for the school district preschool because speech is not enough of a "disability."

notable quotable

"failure is a bruise, not a tattoo."

work

i have decided that i need to be able to have something to do that makes me feel like i'm being productive outside of my house and family.

i've started looking for a job.
i'm working on my resume.
i need to get a cover letter template made up.

it's not going to be a quick process, or produce instant results, but i'm starting.

driving

michael, age 4, "mom, you're really good at driving cars. but not very good at driving carts."

gratitude

today i'm grateful for understanding friends

water and electronics don't mix

michael, age 4 tried to wash the silly putty off the dvd remote…
I think it's toasted

i was able to save it. thankfully.

gratitude

today i'm grateful for all those who have served their country so that i can have the freedoms i do.

thank you

gratitude

today i'm grateful for a cool, dark, quiet place to rest

christmas is coming!

it's time to start thinking about christmas.

last year, i simplified the gift process. and i loved how it ended up working, and cutting down on my stress and clutter.
each child gets 4 gifts. something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read. there's the stuff from santa, and anything else family gives, but it makes it feel less chaotic.

the little girls blankets from their 2nd christmas, are starting to wear out. i decided it was time to make some more. i knew that if i tried to do something too elaborate, they wouldn't get completed, so i brainstormed with some friends and came up with a simple solution. old flat sheets, and batting. i can sew the flat sheets together on 3 sides, slide the batting in the middle of them, and all i have to do is tie them, and close up the last end.

i started looking for fun stocking stuffer items as well.

i hope i can get everything done in time. i really don't like working until 1 or 2 in the morning christmas eve.

fitting

while everyone was at my house, we did a fitting on my sisters wedding dress.
mom is making it in kansas city, my sister lives in provo, everyone was converging on my place for the baptism.
we are pros at multi-tasking!

it's great to be 8!

this has been quite the weekend!

shannon turned 8 on thursday. 

friday, i spent cleaning the house as best i could. it was quite the job too! i ended up filling both the garbage can and the recycling can clear to the top! as well as 3 bags for donations.

stephanie showed up around 6:30, just in time for dinner.

dad's plane got in at 11:15p. and it made for a long night.

saturday, shaun baptised shannon. she was absolutely beautiful!

afterwards, everyone came back to the house for lunch. fried chicken and sides. my grandfather, and step-grandfather used my piano as a table. and they sat there and talked for quite awhile.

gratitude

today i'm grateful to have a house to clean. even when i don't like to

gratitude

today i'm grateful i had a today

housework

oh my word! so much to catch up on and get done!

today, i completely cleaned the front room. got rid of a bunch of stuff, and tried to get things ready for my family who is coming the end of the week.
i also went through the toys and tossed out a bunch.
in all, i took 2 large boxes to donate.

i also started changing up the walkway. our front walk is wooden. and it has a "carpet" on it. the carpet has been falling apart for awhile. (sadly, the walkway wasn't finished correctly, and it is in need of some serious tlc.) i started ripping up the carpet so it could be replaced, or something else put in it's place.
sadly, i am unable to do much because of my wrist that is still giving me grief.

dirty clean

michael, age 4, "mom, i want to go to dirty clean."

mom, "uh... what?"

20 minutes later...

michael, "see mom, that's where i want to go." pointing to the dairy queen sign...

gratitude

today, i'm grateful for fun

gratitude

Today i'm grateful for warm socks

costumes

whoa! halloween is quickly coming up, and i still need to get costumes finished! so, although you can find costumes for mal from descendents, you can't find them in a size that will fit elizabeth. so, we got a little creative, or, i did.

DUCT TAPE!

the beginnings of a custom costume!

pumpkin patch

i wanted to do something a little more interactive with the kids for halloween. especially now that we are not homeschooling. so, i found a local pumpkin patch.

for a small amount, we were able to get 8 large pumpkins, and about 20 mini ones.
on top of that, they had a "train" the kids could ride, and the turkey was wandering about.

 ashley thought the turkey was the coolest thing in the world! she got to pet it!

i replaced my styrofoam pumpkins with the mini ones. they had much more weight to them, and i didn't have to worry about them flying away!

circle of life

ashley, age 6, is devastated cause she found a little bird. it's now missing. the kids think the cat may have eaten it...

halloween requests

this year, i decided to be a teal pumpkin house. with shannon being super sensitive to red food dye, and a few nephews on shauns side of the family that have other problems, i wanted to show my support for a community that frequently gets overlooked at the holidays.
i got a few styrofoam pumpkins at the dollar store, and some teal spray paint. as far as what we were giving out for trick-or-treating, i got a bunch of pencils, and some little erasers, and halloween tattoos (which i almost never do), bouncy balls, and little fun things like that.

taylor, wants to be a wizard.
elizabeth wants to be mal from descendents. (?!)
shannon wants to be a witch
ashley wants to be a cat
michael wants to be spiderman

exectued

michael, age 4, while in thrift store, "mom, i can't find the toys! I think they executed it!"

health updates

taylor has complained about his knee for awhile now. then, one day he came from school in KC, and informed me that he had fallen down the stairs on the bleachers, and his knee was worse.

doctor visit number 4 since we've been back (all of 10 days).
amazingly, this kid now weighs in at 104 lbs!
as for the diagnosis, osgood schlater disease. which shaun also had as a pre/teen. sadly, there's nothing that can really be done. when the pain gets really bad, we give him meds, but we have also starting taping it (watch a video here, on how).

shannon just needed a well-check, so we got that taken care of as well.
she weighs 62 lbs, and is 52 inches tall!

i had more xrays taken, they also came back normal.

thankfully, no one else caught the strep that elizabeth had.

popcorn!

Baseboard heater turns on, it clicks as it warms up. 
michael, age 4, "wait! Mom, what's that sound?"
"The heater turning on."
"Is it cooking popcorn?"

more school

so, it took a few days to get the bus issue figured out. one school didn't have ANY bus info, and every time i called, they were busy.
taylor catches the bus at just after 8, about a block away.
elizabeth catches the bus about 8:15, 4 houses down.

today, i got all the paperwork into the local headstart for michael, only to discover that they were still missing some info, and they didn't have a harvest break, so i could have taken them in last week!

SCHOOL!!

today, i got the kids into school.

i did most of the legwork before we even came back, so it was fairly simple and painless.

the little girls took the most time. there had been a misunderstanding, and there was a bunch of additional paperwork to do. it took me about 45 minutes to get that all done, and the girls to their classes.

elizabeth and taylor were both 10 minute events. they had previously been in the district, so it was just updating info, and getting schedules printed off.

by 9:20a, it was just me and michael

wrist update

xrays and bloodwork all came back normal.
...now what?!

strep

elizabeth brought strep throat home from missouri. hoping no one else catches it!

mama has a gimpy hand

i have had issues with my left wrist for months. it aches, and sometimes burns, and frequently unusable. i finally decided i'd had enough, and went in to see the doctor.

we decided on xrays, to see if there was any indication of arthritis, or improperly healed breaks.
we also did blood work to check for any autoimmune issues.

hoping to have some answers soon. this is getting way out of hand

dental

the kids all had dental appointments on thursday.

NO CAVITIES!

travelling is for the birds

i wish i could say the trip back was as uneventful as the trip out was...

we finally got all packed up and headed out around 10a, monday morning. packing took a little bit of maneuvering, as we were coming back with almost twice what we went out with.
the entire state of kansas was one big dust storm. with wind gusts of 50+ mph.
by 5:45pm, we were into colorado.
by 8p, we were in denver.
we took the route up to laramie instead of into cheyenne. it's a pretty drive, when you have light, and it cuts about an hour or more off the trip. we got to the highway intersection, and found about 12 emergency vehicles. WHAT?! turns out there was a forest fire along the route we wanted to take. so, we had to turn around. it added another hour and a half to our already long trip.
we ran out of gas, on the off ramp, less than 200 meters from a gas station. mom and taylor walked into the nearest gas station, discovering that they were closed. they continued down to the hotel, called a tow truck, and rented a room for the night. when the tow truck showed up he was a sweetheart, and didn't make me wake up the kids and get them out.
the next morning, mom and elizabeth walked down to the gas station, and got a small gas tank and some gas. after we could get it started, mom drove it down to the gas station and filled it up.
the rest of the day was classic travelling. fighting kids, boring scenery (wyoming), and strangely enough, computer issues.
around 4pm, we made it to my grandparents in ogden. at that time, i decided to take a short break and continue on up to idaho. ...that part of the trip was very standard, and we were back by 9p.

buffalo

taylor, age 12, "i'm ready to go."
elizabeth, age 11, "i'm ready to eat a buffalo!"

conference

i love this time of year! it doesn't matter where i'm at, i love it.

being able to sit down and listen to the prophets. to hear what they have been thinking about, and worried about. (cause you know, that's why they give the talks they do. those topics have been on their minds.)

sadly, i have small children who make it difficult. 

i didn't get much out of the saturday sessions. i'm just glad that i can find them later.

the sunday sessions were fabulous!!! the sunday sessions are always fun out here. those who come to the church for the sessions, have a potluck inbetween. i took poppyseed chicken, and mom took cinnamon rolls.

i can't wait to catch-up on the ones i missed!

conference response

shannon, age 7, responding to a comment from conference, "i was born into a lovely family!"

head talk

nathan, age 13, to taylor, age 12, "can i ask you a question? Do you ever hear yourself talking in your head?"
taylor, "yes"
nathan, "oh good, so i'm not crazy!"

talking cat

michael, age 4,"mom, remember, i'm a talking cat"
He then proceeded to tell me that his clothes are cat clothes…

transfers

today, i went onto the school website in idaho to see what i could find that might help me get the kids into school easier when we get back.

everything i needed to do, was right there. shannon and ashley were so simple to get registered. i filled out the online forms, sent in pictures of the documents, and that was it.

taylor and elizabeth are going to have to be done when we get there. as they have previously attended in the school district, it's really just a matter of updating the information, and getting schedules printed.

if only everything could be this easy!

singing and substituting

um, so i used to be in choir in high school. not many people know that. 

i can't remember when i stopped singing. at some point, i even stopped listening to music.

2 weeks ago, i "impulsively" volunteered to sing in church. (i was guided, but it kinda looked like it was impulsive.)

today, i sang.

in sacrament meeting.

in front of at least 100 people.

AND i loved it!!!

i sang "i am a child of god." it was actually a lot of fun. i had forgotten how much i loved doing it. and it was fun to look out there into the congregation, and watch people's reactions. watch them mouth/sing along with me. 

i have decided that i'm going to start doing it more. 

oktoberfest

holy moly, it was hot!!

lee's summit, puts on a harvest carnival, called oktoberfest. craft booths, carnival rides, music, food.

we had fun looking at the crafts, thinking that we could easily make them for pennies compared to the cost they were charging.

the bigger kids ran off to do their thing, and mom, dad, and i kept the little ones with us.

the little ones rode a few rides,

(that's my phone number on michaels arm in the event that he got lost.)

 got sno cones, and then we found the face painter.

and wouldn't you know it, i got sunscreen on everyone but myself!!

functional

michael, age 4, " my hand is functional!"

he then proceeded to "transform" it into a gun.

free fabric

my good friend in missouri called me up one night. (he works at jc penney) he told me that the home department had just brought 4 big boxes of "fabric" back to the be "thrown away."

he was able to smuggle 1 box out for me. 

turns out, they are discontinued curtains. ...you know how stores have sample curtains hanging up so that you can see what they really look like...

sadly, most of them are specialty fabrics. 

but, i was able to take a couple and make a skirt! and it's dang cute! when i can get a picture of it, i'll post it.

whoops!

i totally forgot that we needed to get ashley's kindergarten booster shots!

the county health office in independence gives shots for $10...

got an appointment for first thing wednesday morning.

surprise!

what a pleasant surprise.

mom and dad were "helping" a ward member get to the airport today. it was a coverup. my sister came for a short visit!

friday, mom, steph, and i, went and got pedicures. oh, the warm water, and foot massage!
then, stephanie took the kids to a local shop, called potter's haven. they have ceramic items that you can paint, or glaze.

the small dog on the left is one elizabeth painted for shaun.

the penguin is elizabeths.

the brown cat is michaels.

the pale cat is ashleys.

the hedgehog is stephanies.

shannon did the football...

i did the bear. it's a blue patchwork.

taylor did the blue racecar in front.

notable quotable

"scars should never be seen as ugly. they should be seen as battles won and overcome."

author unknown

in never rains...

but it pours.

yesterday, michael and i went to the library. we went to go home, but the van wouldn't start...

dad had to come home from work early to help me tow it home.

in googling it, dad discovered that there is a known weak solder point in the motherboard behind the dashboard. he tore the dash apart, re-soldered it, and everything works again!

when i say everything works again, i mean that my dashboard lights stay on.

on top of that, the dryer broke, again! someone in the ward has an extra, and they are going to give it to mom and dad. thank goodness, cause 2 days on the line to dry clothes is excessive.

oh my word! it just won't stop!
the van overheated on sunday!
we replaced a radiator hose on monday, and everything is great, so far.

gratitude

today i'm grateful for revelation and inspiration

gratitude

today i'm grateful for me.

direction

today, i went to the temple looking for answers to some questions. specifically regarding returning to idaho.

we are going to travel during harvest break, which is the first week of october. the kids are going to be going into public school. travelling during harvest will make the transition easier for the kids. 

we will be all going together.

i can see

my glasses came today!

i can see correctly again!

notable quotable

"Joy is a higher, wiser form of existence than merely being comfortable."

unsure of the author...

epiphany

today, i had an epiphany! or inspiration. either one works.

we have been previously taking one day a week, typically saturday, and deep cleaning the house. it hasn't worked out all that well. the kids, and i, get overwhelmed with everything.

today, i decided to change the cleaning program.

we are going to focus on one room a day, instead of the whole shebang on one day. i'm hoping the house will stay cleaner, and the kids will actually help...

uh oh!

the dryer stopped...

9 people in the house, everyone needs laundry done, and no working dryer.

and it's not like we can just run a line in the backyard! it's too humid. they will never dry!

dad has ordered a part to fix it. hope it comes soon, and that the "repair" doesn't take forever.

wendy update

turns out, they can't just flush my radiator...

they are going to replace it.

$450!!

GAH! that's double what i was anticipating!

i'm not made of money

this morning, i took the van into a local shop that dad recommended. oil in the radiator is never good.

on top of that, i had to purchase new glasses, some essentials, and different garment tops.
it's just too hot in missouri for the carinessa garments.

4-year old nonsense

michael, age 4, " i have an elbow butt."

crazy day

saturday, is a special day, it's the day we get ready for sunday!

wait, what?!

yesterday was nuts! it didn't help that there were multiple things going on in both places. 

in idaho, the house was getting cleaned and excess removed with help of the ward. 

in missouri, my glasses broke, we discovered oil in the radiator of my new car, and my brother abandoned my oldest children.

all this was on top of the normal daily stuff!

more school

monday we did school stuff. trying to get everyone enrolled, and ready to go. mom has been buying supplies and clothes left and right!

tuesday, taylor had a math placement test. basically letting them know which class to place him in. i took the kids to the school yard for a little bit and let them play around. later in the afternoon we went shopping for more clothes!

thursday, taylor was finally able to start school.
friday, the girls were finally able to start. sadly, michael will not be able to attend head start. they do a screening, and the first available time they had was sept 28.

school

i'd only been out here in kc for a few days before i realized that 2 weeks was not going to be long enough. if a short visit was all that was needed, it might have been. but there were some things that i needed to work on, and some things that needed to be done; and putting such a short time limit on them was just not reasonable.

that being said, i made the decision to put the kids into school while we were here. it was honestly the easiest decision i made.

as i hadn't brought any kind of documentation with me, it was going to be a little tricky. we decided to utilize the homelessness act. it gave me some time to be able to get birth certificates and shot records. it also meant that they kids could start while we were waiting for the documents to arrive.

getting the documents was fairly simple. i had them all in one place, and shaun just had to put them in the mail. turns out ashley still needs her kindergarten booster shots, so we'll be figuring that out.

taylor will be in the 7th grade at the junior high.
elizabeth will be in the 6th grade at the elementary.
shannon will be in 2nd grade.
ashley will be in kindergarten, she's not emotionally or socially ready for 1st grade.
   AND it's all day!
michael we are going to try and get into the head start.

wendy

i need to try and get the van legal. i purchased it in utah, on my way to missouri. as i'm not a resident of utah, and it was a weekend, i can't get plates in utah. i'm not in idaho, and therefore can't get plates there. 

wonder if utah does temporary plates?

or what it would take to get temp plates in missouri?

never fails

it never ceases to amaze me that we can never go on a trip without at least one child getting sick.

tuesday we woke up, and both michael and shannon were complaining of tummy aches. before we could even leave the rest stop, both of them had thrown up. we got things ready to go, and made sure they both had bags to use if necessary.

michael didn't make it to the bag until the 4th or 5th time.

6 hours later, michael was coming out the other end! we stopped at least twice so that i wouldn't have an absolute mess in the car that would have made the rest of us sick.

we'd been at my parents for about 2 hours, and shannon barfed all over grandmas bedroom floor.

i am praying that the return trip is much quieter.

trip

our trip to missouri started satuday afternoon around 3. we could have started earlier, but we needed some clean church clothes.

kronk ran like the champ he is. without fail.
around 3:45p, we ran into some construction. it took us 15 minutes to travel 2 miles...!
we got to my sisters in roy around 6:30p. we stayed at my grandparents for the night, where we got wendy.

monday morning, we were on the road by 9. sadly, we needed a few last minute things, so it took us longer to leave the ogden area than planned.
around 1:30p, we stopped at little america for ice cream cones and potty break.
by 4:45 we were in rawlins, wy for a gas break.
about 8p, we stopped in ft collins for gas and dinner.
i finally called it a night about 12:30a at a rest stop near arriba CO. everyone was already asleep, so i just laid back and tried to get what rest i could.

tuesday we were on the road by 8. around 9, i started having problems staying awake. i popped open and mtn dew and was fine the rest of the way.
around 12 we stopped for lunch and gas; only to discover that my money was missing.
mom and dad wired money to me in Salina, KS.
we got to kc by about 7:20 pm. it was a long trip, but we were so glad to be done!

ickies

oh my word! everyone has had this nasty summer cold!! it's a sinus infection, but it first shows in the eyes. then it drops down into the chest and you develop a cough.

shannon caught it first. then ashley, then michael, then taylor, then me, then michael again! wouldn't you know that i caught it just as i needed to focus on getting ready for our trip to missouri! i was down for 3 full days!

thankfully we are all better now.

more holes

what?!
another tooth gone!

shooting

shaun i are were able to take a firearms basics class. it was 2 night class.
it was so cool! we got to learn about basic safety, and the parts/pieces of guns the first night. the second night we went to the range to shoot.

i shot a .22, a 9mm, and a .40. the .40 was my favorite.

i shot about 50 rounds, and only missed 6 times!

holes

ashley has a mouth full of holes!
she just lost another tooth!

kronk update

turns out, kronk was sicker than we thought. he had oil leaks all over the engine, and huge tranny leak, and a power steering leak that has just begun.
on top of that, the entire ac unit would need to be overhauled.

the decision was made to put him out to pasture and find something "new."

computer

my computer died. the hard drive failed, and we were only able to get a small portion of my files off it.
i lost all my pictures from last october through june.
any files i'd started of altered from the same time period.

yes, i have a backup drive. however, i was having issues with it as well, and hadn't been making a consistent backup...

sadly, i'm not even sure what's missing

scout camp

taylor is at scout camp this whole week. when he gets back, i'll finish this post.

however, even though he is one of my quietest kids, it's even more quiet with him gone....

kronk

kronk has continued to have issues since we got him.
he still leaks transmission fluid.
he's starting leaking anti-freeze.
A/C still doesn't work...
he still struggles to stay in overdrive, and i avoid using it

i need to take him into les schwab and have them fix the tire

today, he's getting a check-up. they are going to look at him, and find the actual issues. then we'll talk about what can and needs to be fixed. especially for our trip to KC ext week.

gratitude

Today, oddly enough, i'm grateful for migraines. It makes me appreciate the good days even more.

gratitude

Today i'm grateful for chocolate. Extra dark

wahoo!!

we had our last class tonight (family culture essentials).
we did a potluck, and talked about how the class has helped us, and what changes it's brought about for our families. we were also encouraged to continue to seek out opportunities to learn and grow, as well as finding them to teach others.

one of the members of our class is an army rotc teacher. he offered to teach us self defense and firearm training! i was so stoked!! so, thursday, we have the basics class, and friday, we go shooting!!

I CAN'T WAIT!!!

changes

there are big changes on the horizon, and although i'm ready to face them, it's not going to be an easy road. there will be many bumps in the road, and times when i feel like i've chosen the wrong path. but i know that this is the path i need to take. i am so grateful that i have supportive friends, family, and leaders. i will definitely be leaning on them a lot in the near future.

gratitude

Today i am grateful for further knowledge and understanding

gratitude

today i'm grateful for everything that has made me stronger!

house

shaun was gone to a conference in SLC this week, so the kids and were planning on going through and getting rid of things. all good plans...

sadly, it didn't go as i had hoped.... i did get rid of 3 bags of clothes...
and got through the huge bag that the bishops wife dropped off.

huckleberry picking was planned, but blythe got sick, and it was not worth the effort on my own.

i was able to sell a good portion of my stamping supplies. i now have a start on savings.

migraines

oh, how i despise them! they take me away from my kids and duties, and make even basic things extremely difficult!

i've had 3 in 5 days. but i finally figured out the cause!

i am UBER sensitive to artificial sweeteners. at first i made sure to just stay away from aspartame. as this last bout showed me, i need to stay away from them all.

i've been drinking something called mommies moonshine. it's an apple cider vinegar concoction, sweetened with truvia.

i will be sticking with straight sugar or hone from now on.

Extracising

Michael, age 4, "I'm extracising."

(The things these kids come up with!!)

Gratitude

today, i'm grateful for temple ordinances and the added blessings they bring

Fourth

Living in two places really stinks. I don't quite belong in either one. 

Williamszoo started the day out with the annual ward breakfast. Yummy biscuits and gravy with eggs and fruit. Then we headed up to monkey rock with lunch and snacks. The current was too fast for the kids, so we fell back to our usual place, the sandbar.
When the storm started rolling in, we left. 

Gratitude

today i'm grateful for witch hazel

growing

taylor needed to have a physical for scout camp, so off to the doctor we went.

this kid is already 5 foot 4 inches, and 96 lbs (soaking wet of course)!! add the mens size 9 shoes at 12, and he's going to be tall!!!

he also had a scout court of honor tonight, where he received his tenderfoot and 2nd class!

Self care

I took a stand last night, and finally asked for something that i firmly believe i am in need of. 

Apparently, i'm being unreasonable and selfish. 

ears

michael has been getting ear infections from swimming...

so, i took him back into the ent.

micheal had tubes put in his ears when he was 1. after they fell out, one of the perforations never closed up. we attempted a fat-patch repair (they take some fat from the back of the earlobe, and place it in the perforation in the ear drum) earlier this year, but it failed. a fascia patch was planned, but never implemented because of the season and swimming lessons.

his ear is starting to close up on it's own!

we also had his hearing checked, and the function of the eustachian tube. all of those are looking great. at this point, we are just going to keep an eye on it.

Gratitude

Today i'm grateful for the strength to do unpleasant things.

drive in

last night, we went to the drive in.

the movies that were playing were finding dory, and alice through the looking glass.
the kids loved finding dory, and the adults loved alice!

Gratitude

Today i'm grateful for moments of peace and clarity

Gratitude

Today i'm grateful for kind, understanding, supportive church leaders

Summer solstice

Today is the summer soltice. To celebrate, we played. We went up to st anthony and played at the sandbar (it was almost too cold for this mama). When we decided it was time to go and eat, we passed the hunter clan on their way in. We decided to grab the food and go back! It's been quite awhile since we've been able to play with these friends. 

i'm not safe

On our weekly trip to thr library, the parking lot was full, so we had to park on the street. The kids all ran to the building. Michael, age 4, stops in the driveway entry, turns around and noticing a car attempting to leave, cries, "Ah! I am not safe!" He promptly turned around and ran back to mom.

Chalk

Conversation between dad and children. 

Dad, "Alright, everyone who plays with the chalk, raise your hand."

Every child raises hand. 

Dad, "That's funny, Kronk (suburban) raised his hand. Should Kronk be playing with the chalk? Do you know what happens when Kronk plays with the chalk?"

Shannon, age 7, tentatively replies, "He breaks them?"

Dad, "He actually crushes them. They turn into dust, and are ruined. He's sitting on one now."

Ashley, age 6, "Get it out!"

Dad, "I don't want to lose my fingers! Stop letting Kronk play with the chalk. Put it away when you're done."

Birthday, conference, and ickies

Interesting, very full weekend.

Thursday was my birthday. Tried to do some school with the kids, and help cheri get her house put together. Late afternoon i started feeling sick. Took some meds and Went out to eat yummy chinese with good friends. I sent shaun home with the kids and stayed with my friend for the night, hoping some good sleep and quiet would help me get better overnight.

Friday i was super sick, and spent the day trying to recover. Stayed in bed most of the day. Had shaun keep the kids at home.

Saturday conference we spent with friends in st anthony. I was still sick, and probably should have been home in bed. But, we had this day planned for a month, and i really didn't want to miss any of it!  I had conference packets for the kids, and treats as positive reinforcement. We did 7-up chicken and potato salad for dinner, and even managed to catch most of the priesthood session too!

Sunday conference started at home. We were hoping to be able to go back up for the afternoon session, but i wasn't feeling any better, and michael was throwing up (he was unable to keep even tiny sips of water down.
We called the home teachers later, and got me, shaun and michael blessings.

Monday we took me, michael, and ashley to the doctor. Ashley was starting to come down with what i have, and michael had been throwing up everyhing for 24 hours. Did a cbc on michael, elevated white count, and dehydrated. We decided on the more aggressive route, a pushed iv fluids, with some fenegran for the nausea. He's doing better, but we are going to keep a close eye on him.
Ashley and i have an upper respratory thing. We both got antibiotics, and i got a steroid shot for the tightness in my chest. I can breathe easier now.

Even being so sick, i think it's the best birthday i've ever had!!

gartitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for sunshine.

2. that i have everything i need.

3. for the chance to be whole.

Gratitude

Today, i'm grateful…

1. for happy children.

2. For inspirational images and quotes.

3. for a considerate hubby!

…so much for 4-wheel drive

Taylor had shakespeare tryouts today. He did a tiny part, but he did it. And he did a dang good job, too!

As i wasn't really interested in staying all day long while they did casting and such, i got a friend to bring him home, and left.
…well, i tried to leave. When i got out to the car, i was blocked in. There was enough room to maneuver around the cars on either side of me, so i wasn't too worried (i forgot to take into account the 2 feet or so of snow, plus mushy earth). I got stuck, pretty quickly. AND it took 6 youth, and 2 additional you to help push me out.

I'm just grateful that i didn't feel like a complete moron, and everyone was willing to help and didn't make me feel horrible.

Gratitude

Today i'm grateful…

1. For the strength of youth. A huge thanks to the Shakespeare Conquistadors!

2. That i can laugh at myself.

3. For the blessings of obedience.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for mercy.

2. for strength.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for blankets.

2. for calming, soothing music.

3.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for people's willingness.

2. for the healing power of friends

3. for the healing power of sleep

changes

i introduced a new friend to this blog, and then discovered that my background had vanished. turns out, the website i got it from, is no longer in existence. 

so, i went searching for something new. it will probably continue to change until i find what i really like.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for family. biological and otherwise.

2. for the beauty of the Lord's creations.

3. for dark chocolate (i'm talking ultra extra dark, like 85%).

gratitude

today i'm grateful..

1. for the opportunity to serve.

2. for the ability to love.

3. for understanding given from on high.

Gratitude

Today i'm grateful...

1. for the knowledge that the Lord will make everything right in the end.

2. for the gift of empathy.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. that i'm discovering my limits.

2. that my best is good enough.

3. to be loved.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for love.

2. for healing and growth.

3. for insanity.

birthday boy

michael turned 4 yesterday.

i was induced at 39 weeks, because my mental health was failing. i kept having dreams that i came home from the hospital without a baby, or even a promise of a baby. i was an wreck, and that was a problem. even so, 2 weeks after he was born, i still had a breakdown.

they started me on pitocin around 10, and he was born about 1:30 in the afternoon, and was by far my easiest labor. the epidural helped...

he has continued to be an easy child.

he is such a delight and so much fun. his facial expressions are hilarious.
he's a ham, and completely charms everyone in any situation. including doctors offices.

we are having a small party for him next sunday afternoon. only nana, and a few friends will be here, but it's going to be fun.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for small miracles.

2. for kind, and loving mentors.

3. for wholesome books.

update

i've been trying to recover, and that means that some things haven't been getting done.

for example, today we did school for the first time since before thanksgiving.

my gratitude posts have slipped.

i'm doing better, and getting better every day, though!

overall, january was a good month. we became very close to another homeschooling family in the area. we unintentionally spent nearly 4 days and nights with them (partly due to weather, and partly due to distance. they live 20 minutes north, and at 3am, driving that home has not been desirable). however, everyone had a grand time, and we continue to spend time together.
taylor turned 12 the first part of the month, and was ordained a deacon and received the aaronic priesthood. (unfortunately, my family was not able to make it out.) we had a small birthday party for him, and he got some awesome books (that's all i can recall about his gifts...).
michael turned 4 just yesterday. a small party is planned for him this coming sunday (i can't believe he's that old!!).

the snow has continued to fall. the piles to the side of my driveway are about 5 feet high. the kids have a blast playing in the snow, and turning the piles into slides.
shannon complains all the time that snow keeps getting into her boots. i told her that's what happens when you walk through the snow.

life continues on.

dryer

the dryer has been really squeaky and noisy lately. 

today, i threw a load in, and it wouldn't start! it had power, and would click, but not run. with the help of a friend, we tore it apart to see if we could fix it.

the belt was super loose, and it turns out, one of the pulleys was worn and needed to be replaced.

i quickly ran to an appliance store to see if they might have the piece in stock. they did! i was able to get it put on, then spent 15 minutes trying to figure out how to wrap the belt correctly.

i pulled taylor in to help me, and with the assistance of the repair directions online, and the light on my phone, he was able to figure out how to wrap the belt!

2 hours later, 3 people, and a $24 pulley wheel, the dryer is working, and it's no longer noisy!!

i am superwoman, hear me ROAR!

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the restorative power of sleep.

2. that i am able to repair small things.

3. for love.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the power of love.

2. for healing.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for added strength.

2. for salt

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for second chances.

2. for the gift of peace.

3. that nothing truly ends.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

(ha ha! i didn't get around to finishing this before it posted... oops!)

1.for love.

2. for snow.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the little things.

2. for happy kids

3. for the knowledge that i am never alone.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the beautiful sunshine

2. that even though i don't have much, the lord still gives me enough to be able to help others.

3. for whiny kids...

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. that i have a deep freezer!

2. for restful sleep

3.

Gratitude

today i'm grateful…

1. for quiet moments.

2. for the beautiful falling snow.

3. for encouragement.

Gratitude

Today i'm grateful…

1. for a lovng Father in Heaven.

2. for the incredible power of the priesthood.

3. For sunday afternoon naps.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for my pre-teens.

2. for my ability to cook and bake. it saves us so much money!

3. for kind neighbors.

Life

It's only 2:30pm, and i've already overdone it today. But, that's what happens when mom decides she's not going to wait for everyone else to do things.

My kids' rooms are nearly clean.
I made lunch.
I finished up my recipe binder project that i've been working on for about 2 years (it's not on the colored paper like i wanted, but they are all printed off.).
We got christmas back out to the shed.
My front room and family room are clean (taylor took care of all but the vacuuming though).

Finding balance is difficult. Even more so when i am not feeling great.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. that i can help others.

2. that my kids fight bedtime. (if they sleep in, so can i)

3. that all my family is safe and sound.

birthday boy

12 years ago today, i was in the hospital, in pain, awaiting the arrival of my first-born. labor progressed quickly, and then stopped. a decision was made to utilize the jacuzzi, hoping i could relax enough to be able to deliver.
at 1:37pm, taylor james came into the world. he weighed in at 6 lbs, 8 oz, and was 19-ish inches long.
his arrival started to heal a pain in my heart and soul. you see, he was my 6th pregnancy, but only my first baby.
by 6 weeks old, the kid was sleeping 12 hours through the night!

he's continued to be a great sleeper.

he loves transformers and legos. playing with friends and on the computer or wii.
he's over 5 feet tall, and can already wear shauns shoes...
he loves scouts, and can't wait to get the priesthood and join his other friends in young men.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the puddles of water (its warmed up, and things are starting to melt...)

2. for my beautiful piano, that my children LOVE to play!

3. for my hodge podge front room

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the healing power of the atonement.

2. that it's warm enough for the kids to play outside.

3. for the knowledge of other people

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the hard times.

2. for understanding kids.

3. to be able to resolve issues.

walls

in conversing with a friend, and trying to understand my new awareness, all my walls collapsed.

all the walls i'd constructed to keep keep the pain and anguish at bay, until i could deal with it, crashed to the earth. i sobbed. and although it didn't last long, maybe 5 minutes, it was enough to start the cleansing.

i will heal.

i will become whole again.

i will, eventually, find myself in a position to be able to help others.

it will take some time. and it will take some work. 

but, i will get there.

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the internet. (it's been wonky the last few days)

2. for knowledge. the more you have, the more you are able to do.

3. for easy-going children.

gratitude

today i'm grateful....

1. for my own bed.

2. for plan b's.

3. for slightly warmer weather. i hate driving on ice.

deeper understanding

this week, i learned a few things that suddenly made everything in my life make complete sense. 

we have some friends who are able to see things that most cannot, and some think is "quacky." in their sharing of that info, i was able to understand myself better.

there is an eastern belief in auras. there are 14 of them. basically, it's a more complex personality spectrum. i am a crystal, and shaun is a mental tan.

i was given the information that has been compiled to read through, and light bulbs starting blinking all over the place. nearly every major life experience and how it has affected me was explained. (and the connections kept being made for days...)

~why the gospel has always been instinctual for me. i have never doubted.

~why i was almost instantly able to recognize when people were not being "true"

~why socialization is a frequent problem for me.

~why i have to make sure that everyone else is ok.

~why when i get upset or need to work through things, i have to do it mainly alone

~why my parenting style is "give them the correct principles/tools, and let them govern themselves."

~why it's so extremely difficult for me to talk about my emotions

also, i learned that my aura fractures from trauma. 

i have 4 main fractures. only 3 of which i will share, and 3 widening events.

1~ moving to kansas city as a teen.

2~ unshared

3~ miscarriage #2 ~ miscarriage #6

4~ elizabeths abuse ~ trial ~ jury duty

fracture 1 is completely healed. 

fracture 3 was healed, and then miscarriage #6 (this last one), broke it open again.

fracture 4 had not been started, and then i was called for jury duty on a sexual abuse case...

although, fracture 3 had healed, it was reopened by the newest miscarriage. i am slowly starting to heal it though.

fracture 4 is causing the most problems right now. it happened over 6 years ago. however, i was so focused on making sure that everyone else was ok, that i never took the time to take care of me. 

in counseling, we think that once everyone else was ok, and i was "able" to focus on me, the ptsd finally manifested. the ptsd needs to be addressed, and perhaps then, the fracture can be healed.

i have a lot of work ahead of me, but i'm excited to be able to be whole again.

weekend

the title is a little deceiving...but only because it's been a long weekend.

wednesday afternoon, i got a fabulous massage from my good friend. i felt better, and was able to move easier.

that evening we went to another friends house for a small gathering. we learned some great things, and are way excited to see how everything turns out. 

after the meeting, we started talking. and the conversation lasted until nearly 6 in the morning...

we stayed the night. 

thursday, shaun and i came back into town. i had counseling, and we had already decided to do new years eve with these friends. there was a weather warning for up to 6 inches of snow though...so we packed up a small suitcase in the event that we needed to spend another night. there was no need, but did anyways.

friday, shaun had to move his things out of a space he was borrowing. he spent most of the day helping, and we ended up spending another night. but, only after shaun was convinced that we were not imposing or causing other problems.

saturday, we finally got home around 5pm. 

it was interesting how completely our families blended together. for the most part, the kids all entertained each other, and the adults were able to have some stimulating conversation. (something all parents of small children need!)

long weekend, but extremely insightful and enlightening.

and as a result of this long weekend, they have become family to us. (i love it when that happens!)

gratitude

today i'm grateful...

1. for the ability to relax and recharge.

2. for humorous kids.

3. for the love of my savior.

Gratitude

Today i'm grateful…

1. for adoptive family.

2. For increased understanding.

3. For the realization that i don't have to do it alone.